Hi Tunester,
I don’t want to freak you out, but whether your kid ends up with a Growth Mindset or a Fixed Mindset, is entirely in your hands (and in the hands of teachers, nannies, etc.)
Eek! First let’s define these terms:
What’s a Growth Mindset?
A growth mindset is the belief that your abilities can be developed and that failures help you grow. People with a growth mindset see setbacks as necessary to learning and improving.
What’s a Fixed Mindset?
A fixed mindset is the belief that talent and intelligence are fixed, and unchangeable. Since people with a fixed mindset believe that abilities are part of a person’s make-up, failure feels like judgment on who they are. Kids with a fixed mindset run from error and because of that may cheat on tests or find shortcuts.
How you respond to your kid’s struggles and successes can be the difference between them beileving that mistakes and failures are opportunities for growth, or believing that there’s no point in trying and quitting.
Not only that, how you react to their failures will one day turn into their own internal voice. No pressure ?
Why do you want your kid to have a growth mindset? Because it means they’re able to WORK HARD even when faced with setbacks. And working hard is THE indicator for your baby’s future success.
If your child thinks of failures as merely stumbling blocks along the way that will actually benefit them, they’ll be willing to get up again and keep trying.
Now let’s talk GRIT
When someone has a growth mindset they’re more likely to develop GRIT, which is determination for long term goals. You can think of it as TENACITY – the passion and ability to persevere through challenge to reach a goal.
Luckily, there are easy fixes you can do, starting NOW, to help your baby or child develop a growth mindset and grit.
How to develop your kid’s GRIT:
- Praise Wisely.
Try not to praise their intelligence, talent or natural abilities, rather their effort and perseverance. Next time your baby is doing something challenging say something like:
“You’re working really hard on that!”
“You were upset when all the blocks fell over but you immediately built the tower up again!”
“That was really hard for you yesterday and now it seems a little easier.” - Use the word YET.
You help them detangle failure from identity when you say something like: “it doens’t mean you’re never going to be good at something, it just means you’re not good YET.” - Support them through the challenge.
When you support your child through failures and challenges you help them practice how to do it on their own . You also teach them that it’s ok to feel dissapointed and that it’s possible to recover and then try again. - Educate them about the Brain.
When kids learn about the brain and how it changes and grows they are much more willing to persevere because they don’t see failure as a permanent condition. Here’s a cute video that can help you educate your child about growth mindset. - Model Growth Mindset.
Dear Tunester, our kids see us frustrated about something many times a day. Let’s make it a learning opporunity for them. Be sure to keep your own growth mindset in check and take your failures in stride and try again. They’re watching you… This post will inspire you further.
What’s your favorite phrase to help your child develop grit? COMMENT below and let us know.
Have a friend who’s kid gets overwhelmed by challenges and failures? Send her this and tell her to sign up for more Tuesday Tune Ins.
For more inspiration on how to inspire a growth mindset join me on Instagram this week.
