Dear in tune parent,
If you have taken my class you know the soothing song and probably use it quite a bit. It works, and you’ve told me it can be a life saver.
But today I’m not talking about the soothing song to get you though the tough moments. This song is even more special than that. Read on, friend.
Here’s the scenario: Last weekend, we went on a camping trip with friends and family. A minor tragedy happened when a rock got thrown at my daughter’s face, right by her eye.
As you can imagine, she immediately turned into a puddle of tears. The blood, the shock, the pain, the fear. So we hugged, we examined we made sure no major harm was done.
And right then, I knew I needed to pull out my most powerful soothing tool. It goes beyond the hugs and the kisses.
It’s probably obvious by now – knowing me – that it was a song. But not the one you think it was.
It’s NOT a soothing song.
It’s OUR SONG – a song that’s just for me and my child.
You know that song for you and your partner that makes you melt and say “That’s our song!” You need one of those for you and your son or daughter.
How to find YOUR SONG
To set up your most powerful soothing tool, choose a song that you associate with feeling happy and connected. For me and my daughter, it is “You Are My Sunshine.”
Find moments to sing it in which you are both content and present. Perhaps in the morning, during bath, as you are walking with the carrier or just playing on the floor. Sing the song often so that it encapsulates the joy of being together.
That moment for us is in the shower. Since my daughter was a baby, I have been singing “You Are My Sunshine” to her as I hold her and she rests her head on my shoulder, while we feel the warm water hitting our heads and shoulders.
Those moments are precious to us both. We both feel relaxed and soothed by the water and feel connected and peaceful together.
The more you do this something magical will happen.
Since that song will be associated with PEACEFUL moments, it will be waiting to help you when you need to soothe your baby.
It is your most powerful tool so use it sparingly.
I suggest using it only when you really need it so that it keeps its place in your hearts as a fully positive experience. If you use it for soothing too much, then it will turn into something else a bit.
BUT for those moments when you need it most, it will be waiting for you.
So back to our day by the lake. The reason the song worked to soothe her was not just because music is soothing and I was rocking her to the rhythm of the song.
Even more than that, it worked because we both associate that song with feeling happy, connected, calm, warm, and alone together in a bubble.
As I sang it to her by the lake, it elicited all of those feelings and that’s what truly soothed her.
Music has the power to tap into our deepest bonds — if we let it.
So now tell me: What song makes you feel happy and connected? Do you already have YOUR song? If so, share which one it is! We need inspiration. COMMENT BELOW.
Now that you know how to find your song, what moments of the day do you plan to sing it to your child and strengthen your connection? COMMENT BELOW.
AND – here’s a fun thing. Are you wondering what the best bedtime routine is for you and your baby? Take this QUIZ I put together to find out.
And maybe your friends need a little bedtime help? Send them this link and maybe they’ll thank you tomorrow morning 🙂