First of all, let’s all take a deep breath.
There’s alot going on these days. We all seem to be teetering between- “Omg the apocolypse!” and – “Eh it’s just the flu,” about 10 times within an hour.
That takes a huge toll on our nervous system.
So today let’s see how music can help.
But first, a story.
I’m in monthly supervision with the Baby in Tune instructors and we’re having a tough conversation.
We’re doing what we encourage YOU all to do in our groups – talk about your challenges openly and get support from each other.
Normally when we meet, besides talking about topics you all bring up, how to best lead a group discussion, and how we can improve on the music activities, we share our own insecurities and where they might get in the way of group leading.
The coversation was open and supportive, but it was also heavy and difficult. At a certain point we desperately needed an energy shift. We needed to release everything that had come up.
So you know what we did? I bet you can guess.
Hell yeah. MUSIC.
I told the instructors about a group I had where one of the moms shared very upsetting news. After processing verbally, we turned to music to take us the rest of the way into supporting and soothing each other.
The song I turn to in moments like that is “Peace like a River.” I’m not sure why, something about the simplicity of it, the predictable melody, the spiritual but not religious lyrics, does it for me.
It reminds me to breathe deeply, bring my focus back to my body, listen closely to the voices of others, and get out of my thinking brain and into my feeling body.
I asked the other instructors “What song does that for you?”
One mentioned “Landslide” and she sang it for us. Pause to imagine it. We didn’t even dare sing with her because we wanted to hear the calm and beauty of her voice.
Another said hers was “Let it Be.” This time we sang along, because we also felt the power of that song to bring us all together.
After a couple of songs we realized that the energy in the room had shifted COMPLETELY. We went from tension, insecurity, and anxiety, to connectedness. To feeling. To being fully in the moment and with each other.
So this week dear Tunesters, I’ve got two tips for you:
1. Share all of your fears and anxiety in our groups.
That’s what they are there for. At this point you know that our classes are not just about singing The Itsy Bitsy Spider. And if you aren’t in our classes share with a friend or a relative.
As Tom Hanks recently said, quoting Mr. Rogers:
“If it is mentionable, it is manageable.”
But talking doesn’t get us there all the way.
2. When you start to feel overwhelmed, find your song.
When you are in the thick of a tough conversation, or find yourself talking about your challenges but not really feeling them, use a song. See if it can help you center, breathe into it, and feel that emotion even more. And if you’re not in a belt-out-loud appropriate place, sing it in your head. Or blast it on your headphones.
I bet you know how I would edit Mr. Rogers’ words just by listening to my music:
“If it’s singable, it’s manageable.”
We all have a song. Now find the one that makes you feel more powerful than the Coronavirus.
Do you have a song that immediately calms you or your babe down (or, bonus points, BOTH of you)? Share with us and all the moms out there in need of a battle cry.
Have you been singing Covid19 to the tune of “Come On Eileen?” If not it may be time to start.
Have a friend who needs to hear this? Send them the Tuesday Tune In so they can relieve their anxiety momentarily as well.
And tell them to sign up below so they can get more of these.