Dear Tunester – Today I want to talk about a topic that’s both painful and beautiful: Time. I’ve been thinking a lot about the phrase, “I don’t have time.” As in: “I don’t have time to spend time with my baby.” Or “I don’t have time to do music with my baby.” – I … Continue reading The real reason I don’t spend time with my baby
I’ve got some big news for you all and it deserves its own Tune In, not even on a Tuesday. Do you have non-New Yorker friends or family who you wish could have taken my class with you? Do you work 9-to-5and wish you could have taken my class if time was limitless? Now. Everyone. … Continue reading I just did something awesome/crazy/scary
Today’s blog is about finding your musical creativity despite your limitations. You know, the self-diagnosed level of musical genius you do – or don’t – have. Even more than that, today is about finding your musical creativity within and because of your limitations. Many parents in my groups say that they are not musicians, that … Continue reading I’m not a real musician
Dear tuned-in parents, As you know, I’m sold on music as a way to communicate with our babies. Let’s say I’m a 10 out 10. This Tuesday Tune-in is for any of you who are floating around a 6 out of 10. Basically this is for those of you who are saying: “I feel like … Continue reading What’s so good about music, anyway?
Dear tuned-in parents, Today it’s all about you. It’s time to time to tune in to YOU. As you know, attachment theory shows that in order for parents to be emotionally available to develop a secure bond with their baby, they need to have THEIR needs met as well. And in case you’ve forgotten what … Continue reading Step one to a happy baby
Dear in tune parent, If you have taken my class you know the soothing song and probably use it quite a bit. It works, and you’ve told me it can be a life saver. But today I’m not talking about the soothing song to get you though the tough moments. This song is … Continue reading This song is magic
Dear tuned-in parents, To begin today’s Tuesday Tune-In, I want to tell you how my morning went. Spoiler: It has nothing to do with music and everything to do with tantrums – a parent’s least favorite sound. Everything was normal to start. I gave the kids morning hugs – my eldest on the couch, my … Continue reading Ready? Let’s tackle tantrums
Dear tunies, Today’s post is a reminder to you that – even though it might not always seem this way – your music is within you. Now let’s figure out how to get it out. Why? Because your baby wants to hear it. Pinky swear. It might surprise you to hear this but I … Continue reading Your music is within you. Your baby wants to hear it.
Hi, you! I see you doing the hard work of prioritizing tuning into your baby. With all the time you spend down on the floor with her gazing at her tiny lips and toes, you’ve probably cherished some of her tiny sounds, too. These tiny sounds turn into big babbles (and eventually, yes, demands for … Continue reading I bet I know your baby’s first word (& here’s why)
Dear Tunester, This week’s post is a super simple strategy for tuning in that you can try out immediately. Like right now. It’s fun; it’s easy; and it a superpower: This game can repair a temporarily broken relationship with your child. Every now and then I feel like one of my kids drifts away … Continue reading When you feel distant from your kid, do THIS
Dear Tunesters, I hate to say it but it’s time for us to get back to work. The summer has been a blast. We can still taste sticky melted ice cream on our fingers, feel the salt in our hair and see the rosy glow on our cheeks. As wonderful as it was, if you … Continue reading How to reclaim your routine (Hint: music)
My Dear Tune-iverse, Any plans to share a summer house with family or friends this weekend? Our intentions are so well meaning when we make plans to get all our favorite people under one roof. Sure, there are differences in what people eat and don’t eat or what music they like or don’t – but … Continue reading Your Labor Day Weekend survival guide
Dear Tunester aka Parent in Tune, In today’s Tuesday Tune-In, I’m going to share what we can do when we feel like time’s rushing by so fast and our babies are changing and growing in a way that’s equally exciting and heartbreaking. I mean, I know time doesn’t go by fast when you’re not sleeping … Continue reading You can’t stop time. But you can do this
This Tuesday Tune-In is short and sweet – and the point of it is to hear from you at the end. Recently, while listening to a podcast I love called “Magic Lessons,” I heard a quote that I’ve been thinking about a lot by playwright/performer Sarah Jones: “What if joy is my only metric for … Continue reading What are your 3 things?
Okay, in-tune parents – Today I’ll be your mythbuster. Does the Mozart effect really work? Is classical music actually better for your babies? Will it make them geniuses? I’m going to do my best to dive into this question. Plus, as a special bonus, I have been working on a classical music playlist that is … Continue reading The Mozart effect. Is it a thing?
It’s summer! Let’s go somewhere. Wait. The dreaded road trip. What will we do with all those hours in that small air-conditioned space? Whether you are traveling to the beach, to the country, to your hometown, or cross-country destinations you’re going to need some go-to activities for those moments when everyone is getting antsy … Continue reading 17 roadtrip games to keep the peace
You! Tuned-in parent. Sun! Summer is here. It’s my favorite favorite season. I don’t care how sticky it is and how much we sweat. We are finally free from the indoors! Our babies get fresh air! You with me? We don’t despair by 5pm because we can just go outside. And see friendly faces. … Continue reading THIS is what summer sounds like
Dear tune-iverse, The other day, I was hanging out with a friend and we were talking about how summer comes along and everything gets thrown off. All the little pieces of our lives that we managed to arrange, just so, tend to get all jumbled into a little fiesta. We kind of go from my … Continue reading Summer: Keep your schedule or toss it?
Dear parents – Let’s tune in. This Tuesday Tune-in continues our summer-transportation series. (Last week, I gave you a playlist to use in the car. Go here to check it out). Today, let’s talk flights. Keep reading for my tips or watch this video of my kids and I on a flight. Listen, if anyone … Continue reading How to survive a flight with a baby
Summer is upon us and that means two things: 1) spending a lot of time outside 2) spending a lot of time in the car getting to the places where we will be outside Don’t worry. I’ve got you covered. This week’s Tuesday Tune-In is all about introducing you to Kindie (kid-indie) music you … Continue reading Your summer drive playlist for kids
It’s that time of year, in-tune parents: The end of the school year. We’re all excited, right? No wait. We’re all terrified we’ll never have a moment alone again. That’s right, right? Maybe we’re all sad our babies are becoming less baby-faced with every graduation. That seems more right. But the truth is: We’re all … Continue reading Holy shit, Schools out! All the feels.
Dear tuned in parents, Today is all about family fun. Most of you connected with me when your first baby was tiny. Now, many of you have bigger families. I had your entire crew in mind when I wrote today’s Tuesday Tune-In on how to use music to bring everyone in your home together, including … Continue reading 5 musical family activities
Dear parents, In this Tuesday Tune-In (coming out a little later than normal becuase I had a show this morning,) we are tackling why it’s so hard to be PRESENT with our kids – or with anything for that matter – and what you can do to get in the moment. These days we are … Continue reading 6 things I do to feel more present with my kids
Hello, tuned-in parents, Today we’re going to talk about a technique that is used in music therapy called Vocal Holding. I think you’ll find that it is a nice alternative to purely consoling our babies with speech. And you might even find that it works better. I had to use it just the other day. … Continue reading A surprising way to soothe your baby
Today, I’m going to share 1 tip & 1 activity that releases yourself from the nagging belief that we need to do all kinds of things in order to enrich our babies. Welcome to the Tuesday Tune-In. Here we go. We really do drive ourselves crazy, right? It’s an epidemic of our generation. We had … Continue reading You don’t need to enrich your baby
Tell me if you relate. You sing a lullaby; give your baby the last feed; and prepare everything for a perfect landing into the crib. Your baby is drowsy and he falls asleep instantly. You’re doing an internal happy dance because Me Time is just around the corner. You taper your song a bit and … Continue reading The most important moment when putting baby to sleep
I’m on a bus in Croatia, pregnant with my first baby. Mountains to both sides and a good two hours ahead of me. I put my headphones on to listen to the album I had recorded before I left New York. I needed to listen objectively, as an outsider. I needed to be real with … Continue reading Two songs that changed my life
As you know, I love drumming with little ones. If you’ve been in my classes for older babies, you know that we often dive into drum circles and learn drumming rhythms and styles from other cultures. For years, I’ve been looking for drums that don’t take up too much space and still sound good. I finally found them. These nested Frame Drums are perfect for pulling out and having a family drum circle and then being able to store them away.
Hello, dear parents, Today’s Tuesday Tune-In highlights a simple and quick happiness technique. I use it in groups all the time and do it on my own as well. It involves two things: Grounding through breath and feeling grateful. I write to you today from sunny Florida where I am spending spring break with my … Continue reading One way to feel happier today
Dear, People who deal with all the pee and all the poop: You’re going to love The Tuesday Tune In this week. Ok. Spoiler alert: I tell you how to write a Diaper-Changing Song. We all need one as bad as we need hand sanitizer. So I bet you didn’t realize how deep in shit … Continue reading One quick way to solve diaper changing
I’m really excited about this Tuesday Tune In, friends. It’s about parents taking a page from sailors in order to figure out what makes for an expert parent. It was inspired by something a yoga instructor said in class this week. (Ok. It was Chase Connolly from my favorite studio.) I’ve been thinking about it … Continue reading What makes for an expert parent?
One of the things that makes Hamilton so unique is that it is almost entirely sung. When you listen to the soundtrack, you’re pretty much getting the entire show. And for those who were lucky enough to see it, it’s an amazing experience to see an entire story told without speaking.
It reminds me of when I had my first baby and all the books and blogs said to narrate what I was doing with my baby. This would help him develop language, they all agreed. The idea was that the more language the baby hears, the more they will pick up on the sounds, syncopation and structure.
When my plate is overflowing, my partnership is the first to suffer.
Okay. It’s true that he accepts my ebbs and flows. Maybe he’s even proud of me during those times. But I know that he also feels neglected. I start to see the signs: our conversations become all about household business, he stays up late watching TV, we don’t get in bed at the same time and we are a bit shorter with each other. I’ll even see negative effects trickle down to the household. The kids become shorter with each other and compete for attention. That’s a pretty convincing case that I need to shift my focus.
How do I make this shift? No need to immediately jump to sex. When there’s a rift in the relationship that can feel way too threatening. Instead, here are the 2 steps I’ve found work best. …
You don’t need to be a musician to lead a drum circle. You don’t need special drums. Break out the pots and Tupperware – or just use the floor – and start banging. Believe me: Baby will follow your lead.
There’s a reason for this: It feels good to drum with someone else. It’s similar to the feeling we have when we dance with other people. Humans enjoy synchronizing to the rhythm of music, especially with others.
I say, for the next week, Let’s see what happens when we push ourselves to give in for those two extra minutes – whether it’s the extra hug, the detour or the added rocking.
One of my biggest struggles as a parent is to do all of the things I do every day (career, errands, tasks, social life) and also find a way to be fully present with my kids.
I’ve found that this is one simple shift in my behavior that changes everything.
Here’s a method that I use when I’m singing at the mic. I’m hoping it will help you when you are singing to your baby. Because here’s the thing: Your baby wants to hear you sing. More than Paul McCartney, more than Aretha. Your baby wants to hear YOU.
The Five Minute Journal
In the morning, you write 3 (or more) points for each of these:
I am grateful for…
What would make today great?
Daily affirmations: I am…
In the evening you write 3 (or more) points for these:
Amazing things that happened today
How could I have made today even better?
“If you’re the parent of a young child, you probably know Vered. If not, you should. The Brooklyn-based singer and music therapist has a knack for writing songs for every kind of kid, from infants to older sisters, and every kind of childlike parent.” Paste Magazine
Some of my favorite classes to teach are dads groups. Usually they are organized by the moms who took my class, who want the dads to have the experience they did. And during those weeks I get to hear about it all through their eyes. Much of the stuff they talk about is the same. The … Continue reading Something Other Than a Mom
Usually the fights have to do with sharing. Sharing a toy, a friend, a cousin, a food. And they do want those things, but below the surface, that’s not really what they are fighting over. They are competing for the love and attention of us parents. They want to know – do you love me the most? Do you think I’m the most special of all your kids? Am I unique and special?
Hi everyone, I am so excited to announce that my new album has been released to the world. It has been a year of HARD WORK. Seriously, doing my classes, training a new therapist, recording an album, launching a Kickstarter, and oh yeah, raising three kids, has been alot this year. But now I am … Continue reading NEW ALBUM IS OUT!!
People, I haven’t been great about posting on this blog. But that is because I have been spending my time posting on my VLOG! So if you haven’t subscribed already. DO IT! You will get the straight to your inbox right when I hit publish. And guys, the vlog takes alot of work. It takes … Continue reading The VLOOOOOOOOOOOG
The end of this summer has been – complicated. While the country was revealing it’s ugliest faces I was away in my semi-homeland Israel. These days there are too many similarities between the two states. I came for a long vacation with the kids. My husband was with us for the first half and I … Continue reading Vacation!! With kids and without
For those of you who are wondering what a vlog is, it is a blog on video. Until now I have been keeping this blog, although not as regularly as I would have liked, where I have been writing impressions from my work with parents and babies and have been bringing in articles or things I … Continue reading I started a Vlog!!!!
In 2015 I attended the Zero to Three conference for the first time. I was inspired to be in the company of 3000 other practitioners who devote their career to benefitting the care of babies. You can read about my biggest takeaway from that conference here. I walked away from the conference saying to myself – I want to present there … Continue reading My takeaways from the Zero to Three conference 2016
My groups have been more intense lately. In the last few, weeks as a result of world events, I have entered rooms where parents are already teared up, feeling overwhelmed, seeking community and connection with others. Normally in my groups the discussions revolve around challenging and joyful moments parents have had with their babies. We … Continue reading Happiness in a Minute
I am not a chef. I admire and envy those people who feel so utterly comfortable in the kitchen. Usually it is because they have been watching their mother (father?) cooking in the kitchen since they were kids. There was no scene like that in my house. My parents both worked a lot and I … Continue reading For the NON-CHEF (/working+distracted+couldn’t be bothered/parent)
My 4 year old did something terrible and unthinkable. He choked his 1.5 year old sister, enough to make her cough. He has pushed her before, grabbed from her, or given her a too-hard hug. But this felt alot different. I was terrified, mortified, and so angry. After making sure she was ok I sent … Continue reading Helping Them Connect the Dots
Not sure how I got myself into it. A day flight, with three kids, on my own, including a 1.5 year old lap-baby. Is this what hell looks like? Let’s back up. I spent a great month in Israel. Grandparents galore! And we did it right this time – the boys went to camp and … Continue reading How I Survived an 11 Hour Flight On My Own With 3 Kids and Other Musings
The third baby feels like a gift that the world offered to me and I selfishly took. Did I just write that? A gift? How about when she is crying at 3am or is having her 5th tantrum of the day? And Selfish? What about all the selfless giving that it entails? A gift, because … Continue reading The Third Baby
For the last few months I have been thinking a lot about creativity. Mostly because I’ve had a hard time connecting to my own. Not to say that it has ever been that easy for me. It’s always been a struggle on some level. But this last year has felt especially dry. I know I … Continue reading Creativity
Watching the game between Serena and Venus the other night was emotional for me. I was on the edge of my seat. Would Venus be able to stand in the way of her younger sister achieving a Grand Slam this year? Would Serena be able to get out of her younger sister role and beat … Continue reading How Serena and Venus inspired my songwriting
Maybe it’s that back to school feeling in the air, maybe it has to do with my baby reaching her 9-month milestone, or maybe it is a reaction to last year, which was a year of production (CD, videos, a baby). Whatever the reason, I am feeling a strong need to fill up my cup … Continue reading Back to School – For Me
I know this looks familiar. Our kids have a pretty strong relationship with this screen that is both touching and heartbreaking. Every day I ask myself why I live so far away from my parents. I know so many of us do. In my case my parents live in Israel, and a life there at … Continue reading The screen we call Grandma
Mother’s day is around the corner. What would I like for my present? Sleep wrapped up in a bow. I knew going into this that sleep wouldn’t look pretty. Three kids, two grownups, 2 bedrooms. So this is how sleep looks in our home at the moment. All of us but one 6 month old … Continue reading All I Want
So far “Hello My Baby” is being received fantastically. Thank goodness. I have to say, I was a little nervous about it. I felt like I was taking a huge risk. Sure it has some light tunes like Hello, Cooking, Changing, and Peekaboo, but it also has some heavy ones, like Something Other Than a … Continue reading Hello My Baby is getting some love
Those of you who have taken my workshops know that one of the first things we talk about is how to use music to establish your routine with your baby. What would that look like? For one, singing the same lullaby every time you put your baby to sleep. By doing this you are helping … Continue reading Dialing in the Lullaby
You guys probably know that making an album costs a ridiculous amount of money. Truly ridiculous. But it makes sense – I like to work with the best of the best and bring my songs to life in the most beautiful way I can imagine. On this album I am working with a Grammy winning producer named Dean Jones, the Babes, Jon Samson, Saul McWilliams, and other amazing musicians and technicians. And that can get costly.
Ladies and gentleman I would like to introduce my new business name and my new website! I have been working on this for a while, plugging away late at night after the kids are asleep. I am so excited that it is ready to be unveiled. Here are some of the new develpments:
1. Videos! I put a bunch on this site and there will be more added periodically. There is a beautiful video for Good Morning My Love coming down the pipeline so stay tuned…